Welcome back beautiful people to my sanctuary for the insane
and also welcome back to the not so beautiful people too. Everyone is welcome
here, from the stunning to the grotesque. There is no judging here although
most of my posts are based on my own biased and judgmental views so be warned.
Where have three months gone? There I was sat at my laptop typing the words for
my last post, sipping on a chalice of baileys on the rocks planning to make my
blog posts more regular. The next minute I am sat here watching the cricket
with a bottle of half strength lager thinking “bloody hell I’ve forgotten to do
my blog for a while.” This is simply not good enough and I am writing this post
with red wrists considering myself well and truly told off. Right then, on with
the garbage you all came to read. Let’s hope this is more comedy than my last
few, but I can’t predict that as I don’t really know what words are coming next
to be honest. Let’s discover what lies in store together...
I am a proud Englishman. I love being part of this beautiful
green country and its rich heritage and history. As a sports fan I always feel
great whenever our national teams and athletes do well. Last year was an
amazing year for British sport with the Olympic Games in London and the gold
rush that followed, Bradley Wiggins winning the Tour De France, Andy Murray
taking the US Open title, the cricket team becoming the no.1 test side in the
world and Chelsea fluking the Champions League in the football. These
achievements fill me with pride as a citizen of this country, but are not the
main reason why I love being English.
Another good reason is the way we are perceived by the rest
of the world...The plucky Brits, the stiff upper lip, our famous sense of
humour and our poor dental hygiene. Why are we seen as people with yellowish
black crooked teeth? Whenever I watch an episode of Family Guy involving an
English gentleman we are depicted as either posh upper class pretentious
aristocrats that have some sort of political superiority complex or as scraggy
haired common cockney crippled medieval dressed incompetent buffoons. I half
expect the uneducated of the world to believe that we still go around by horse
and cart lighting street lamps every night with this new invention called fire.
I admit that I have been guilty of throwing my own urine from my bedroom window
in the past due to high volumes of alcohol consumption and being egged on by my
Neanderthal mates. This doesn’t mean that the London streets are lined with
excrement anymore and that cholera is a common disease in our nation’s capital.
The perception from the rest of the world isn’t the main
reason why I love my heritage though. Nor is the fact that there always seems
to be a Brit cast in the baddy role in big Hollywood blockbusters. The accent
is well received in certain quarters too, especially the common Home Counties
accent that I have. Some believe Cockneys to be Australian for some weird
reason and many regional accents are mistaken for other nationalities. I think
that our accents should be admired for what they are – proper English...The
Queen’s English. Reinvent our language all that you want but it will never be
quite the same as proper English. We should be proud of that but it is not the
main reason why I love being British.
Our armed forces are admired all over the world for the way
that they conduct themselves in hostile terrains and difficult situations. The
Army, the RAF, the Navy and our special forces members are the most respected
and envied, these brave men and women of our shores are all the proof you need
that it is not necessarily the quantity that prevails but the quality. We pride
ourselves not on having the biggest in numbers but the best, having fully
trained men and women who all are there to prevent rather than eradicate. Our
armed forces are a reason for us all to be proud but not the main reason why I
love being part of this country.
Another compelling reason is our climate; ever changing
weather gives us the greenest of meadows and the lushest of home grown crops
and livestock. Earthquakes, hurricanes and tornadoes are rarer than a Scottish
appearance in the World Cup. We have it so good on our Island that we take it
for granted how lucky we are to have such mild weather systems. Our beaches are
clean and sandy, ok they aren’t tropical but with tropical come snakes and big
bugs so swings and roundabouts. This is another great reason to love being
British but not the main reason for me.
Ok so here it is - my main reason for my love for this
country and my pride at being a part of it. I love this country because I can
sit watching cricket in my pants on my day off writing a post for my blog
drinking beer and no one has any right to judge me for it...
Thanks for reading J
